You see, I still, after all these years and all these lessons, I still succumb to my eating disorder daily. Don’t get me wrong, it looks a lot prettier than it used to. I don’t pop laxatives like candy and I don’t end a feast on my knees in front of the toilet. I don’t even eat to the point of pain anymore, no third or fourth or fifth servings- no half-gallon of ice cream straight out of the carton. Yet I still…
In 2013, inspired by Pinterest and, frankly, sick of my own body image crap, I decided to become a blogger. I would write about beauty, fat, our culture, and loving my body. And why not? Who better qualified to be a fatshionista than me? I certainly had no shortage of opinions on the subject. My sense… Continue reading Trust Me, I’m a Blogger
“I turn women into perfect 10’s,” my cosmetology student boasted, sweeping his gaze down my form. The implication, of course, was that he could fix me up. Take me from my current rating, which whatever it was, certainly wasn’t a 10, to that elusive pinnacle of beauty that women crave. For a moment I didn’t… Continue reading A Perfect 10
WordPress sent me a little congrats this week- it seems I have hit the one year mark for my blog. For a woman known for her strong starts and little to no follow-through, this is a serious accomplishment. In one year, I’ve been so blessed by this platform from which to share my writing. I’ve… Continue reading Something to Celebrate!
Do you remember that old game on Sesame Street? They’d display four images on the screen while they played the sang, “One of these things is not like the other. One of these things just doesn’t belong.” I loved that game as a child. And no wonder, even as an adult I like finding patterns… Continue reading Zombie Sightings
I love swim class. Really. When I walk into class and see “100 easy, 300 kick/pull/swim, 50 scull, 50 seated breast pull” scrawled on the board, I cheer. I’ll do dolphin kick for days. I’m totally content practicing breast stroke all class. I’ll earnestly work on my back stroke for an hour. There’s only one… Continue reading This is Only a Drill
Hello again my love, I have missed you more than you could ever know. It’s been almost two months since we were together: fifty-one days away from your presence. I felt your absence like a constant achy hollow spot under my ribs and a leaden weight to my limbs. When I closed my eyes each… Continue reading A Love Letter to an Old Flame